Dating Violence Online Dating Secret
Friends Guide
Dating Violence And Knowing The Signs
By Janine Jensenoris
Dating violence has become so widespread these days
that it is almost viewed as "normal." In the
United States, a woman is more likely to be assaulted,
battered, raped or killed by a male partner than by
a stranger.
It’s estimated that 7% of all murder victims were young
women under age 24 killed by their boyfriends. Six out
of ten rapes occur in their own home by a partner, not
a dark alley. A whopping 40% of teenage girls, between
the ages of 14 and 17, said they knew someone their
age who had been beaten by a boyfriend.
Once you’ve "been through so much," where
do you draw the line on dating violence and say "enough
is enough?" Over time, as patterns emerge, it’s
natural for one to lose sight of reality. It seems like
"everyone fights" or is involved in some drama,
yet that doesn’t make it ok.
You Are Not A Punching Bag
You do not ever have to be someone’s physical or emotional
punching bag. There are so many other possible partners
out there, don’t think you have to settle, especially
so young. If your partner shoves, slaps, hits or punches
you, then get out!
If you fear bringing up certain topics, feel you’re
walking on egg shells or that you’re a prisoner in your
own home and suspect he’s listening in on your phone
calls, then escape while you still can! If he’s accusing
you of cheating, giving you "the look," calling
you disparaging names or shouting at you, then remember
that you don’t have to put up with his abuse.
Inexperienced In The Dating World
Teen dating violence is often hidden for many reasons.
As a teen, you’re relatively inexperienced in the dating
world and you haven’t fully figured out what is normal
behavior and what is excessive mental illness or severe
behavioral problems yet. You may feel like all of your
peers are "acting violently," that violence
is "masculine," or view your relationship
as defiance against your parents.
Many teenage boys mistakenly believe they "possess"
their girlfriends, have the right to "control"
their partners, have the right to demand intimacy, that
their girlfriends "force" them to resort to
violence, and that they may lose respect if they are
attentive and supportive to their girlfriends.
Abuse Is Not Normal
Many teenage girls mistakenly feel there is only one
person for them, that they are solely responsible for
problem solving, that their boyfriend’s jealousy is
really just love, that there is no one to ask for help
and that abuse is "normal." The reality is
that teens can identify warning signs, exercise their
tremendous number of options and live a healthy, happy
life as a valuable individual who deserves respect.
Many teens recognize that their boyfriends have "anger
problems," but they refrain from seeking help because
they want to deal with it "on their own."
Perhaps, it’s naivety or they fail to realize that dating
violence is more than an inconvenience. It is extremely
dangerous and it is often deadly.
Injury Requiring Medical Care
More than one third of all partner-committed rapes
and physical assaults result in injury requiring medical
care (NVAW Survey, July 2000). According to the CDC,
there are 2 million injuries and 1,300 deaths caused
by intimate partner violence.
Additionally, medical expenses from domestic abuse
totaled $3-5 billion (Domestic Violence for Health Care
Providers, 3rd Edition, Colorado Domestic Violence Coalition,
1991). To stop the cycle of violence, teens must report
incidents and seek treatment.
About the Author:
Janine Jensenoris is a popular author of dating articles
including Adult
Personals, Blind
Dating, Chat
Websites, Real
Friends, Adult
Party Favors, Conversation
Starters, Abusive
Relationships, Difficult
People, Anger
Management, Mother
Daughter Relationships, Interracial
Relationships.
Keep a lookout for more articles coming soon.
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